Farewell then Liz Truss: 45 days, 1 mini-Budget, 1 resignation, 2 monarchs, 2 Chancellors, 3 sackings and 3 PMQs. Those setting pub quiz questions will forever be in your debt.

As for the runners:

1. Sunak: sensibly stayed away from the Cabinet. Campaign slogan: “I bloody told you so!“
2. Hunt: appears to be calm and a grown up. Probably the only one willing to speak (and implement) some hard truths to both the party and the country.
3. Mordaunt: only if you want someone who combines the worst aspects of Truss (vacuous, over-promoted, ambitious with no achievements to her name but willing to suck up to whoever is in power and push harmful policies) and Johnson (a liar). She can string sentences together and make dirty jokes. But so can Joe Lycett.
4. Johnson: oh please…… We know the saying “the first time as tragedy, the second time as farce“. We don’t have to live it.
5. Badenoch: needs to learn that being “anti-woke” (assuming anyone can define it) is not a coherent programme for government.
6. Tugendhat: no – blotted his copybook by accepting a job from Truss (and such a low level one, at that – if you’re going to sell yourself make the price high at least).
7. Wallace: has reached his level of competence. Should stay there.
8. Braverman: only if the Tory party’s strategy is to go for the batshit insane tofu-hating voter.
9. Everyone else in the Truss Cabinet: no – if they were daft enough to accept jobs from her, they’re unfit to be leader.
10. Anyone favoured by the ERG, Lord Frost or Farage: absolutely not – they are the Tory party’s Corbynistas and have all but destroyed it. Should be expelled not indulged.
11. Mrs May: we’re now into Land of the Blind territory, aren’t we.
12. Larry the No. 10 cat: good instincts (refused to be petted by Liz), saw off the Treasury cat and utterly fearless when it comes to foxes so will have no trouble with the nest of vipers known as the Tory party.

Slim pickings, really. But them’s the breaks.